The dark is scary because you don't know what's out there.
Once you shine a light though, it's not so bad!
If you're grappling with a decision, get specific and figure out what it is that's actually worrying you about it.
Fear-setting is a useful exercise to get specific with naming your fears.
There are three parts to the technique:
I.
Confront your fears head-on by identifying them and imagining the worst-case scenario.
Doesn’t that general sense of anxiety seem a bit more manageable now that they’ve been given names?
If they have identities and trajectories, that means you can predict and defend against them.
One question to keep in mind as you're doing this first page is:
Has anyone else in the history of time… figured this out?
Chances are, the answer is “Yes.”
II.
This second part is meant to negate your high expectations or perfectionism.
If you lower your expectations of an explosive success, are there still benefits to attempting this actions?
Keep in mind that while you can easily predict the risk of making a leap, there is no way to predict the upsides of a new journey.
As long as that chief concern is one you think you can manage, the most rational thing to do is to actually make the jump.
By not making that leap, you are voting to give up all unimaginable future rewards for a single concern you can predict and prepare for today.1
III.
The third part of the exercise forces you to examine the status quo. This was the most helpful section for me as I was debating whether to leave my job or not.
I realized that not making a decision was still a decision!
If I didn’t do anything now, I was going to have the same lingering “what if”s years from now, but potentially with larger commitments, e.g. marriage or children.
I realized a year in my 20s was not the same as a year in my 60s.
I couldn’t keep on deferring.
Recap
Fear-setting allows you to gain control over your fears. By naming and planning for them, you can make calculated decisions.
If you’re a Notion user, you can use this free template I made to try this exercise out yourself.
Don’t let fear dictate your actions!